The term BDSM encompasses a wide range of sexual and sensual activities, including power/role playing, sensory games ranging from teasing to intense “pain,” and much more. This style of sexuality has received a lot of attention in recent years, and is undergoing an explosion of creativity and growth.

When I was asked to write articles about BDSM, mistresses, slaves and submissives , I first thought where, do I start. Writing about each individual part of the alternative lifestyles was just too hard to do before writing this article first. It gives me the opportunity to work my way through the different parts or sections of BDSM so that you as a reader can follow me as you go.

Where do I belong in the BDSM scene? Well many years ago I could never have been anything within it. I certainly wasn’t into pain and I was never one who could inflict any sort of pain on any one. Just over two years ago when I was writing various columns and articles for people I thought I’d travel down a path that I rarely ventured down. I began looking on the internet for sites that were bizarre and for sites that included dungeons.

Ok so some of you may not feel that that is a strange combination, but for me back then it was. You see I love it when I go looking for different things and in doing so sometimes it can bring back lots of memories. What I found was a fantasy world of dungeons and dragons; a game I remember my ex-brother-in-law playing once a week with five other guys. The mystery and the secrecy of what happened in that game had always baffled me…

BDSM encompasses consensual explorations of sensation and/or power dynamics, and includes Bondage and Discipline, Dominance and Submission, and Sadism and Masochism. Whether you want to tie up your sweetie, act the part of the dominant, or get a nice spanking, you’re in good company. Plenty of people like BDSM because playing with power can be exciting, releasing, erotic, and just plain old fun.

However that wasn’t really what I was looking for. I was more interested in looking at the life of BDSM. A couple of friends that were heavily into the swinging scene and they participate in this form of sexual gratification. I’ll call these two people Sally and Sam due to privacy reasons…

Sally was very submissive and Sam was the dominant one of the two. To see them in action was often very mystifying. Quite often during their ‘sessions’ together Sally would go into a trance, into a world far away; she was so tied up in the pain that the pleasure she received from Sam’s whippings and the pain of her seduction was something beyond belief. I couldn’t comprehend what satisfaction she got out of being subjected to such pain.

I did learn however that you had to trust the person that they were submitting to and that they place themselves under the power of another in sexual context. Sally and Sam fell into the area of D&S – The submissive, Sally allows the dominant, Sam to use her body for his pleasure. They play an erotic power game where they both get off on the thrill of controlling and the other being controlled…..